Forbidden Fruit
by Hot elf
Summary: Cullen knows he can't have Hawke, but a guy can dream... Rated M for a reason.


**Forbidden Fruit**

Cullen was lost from the moment he first set sight on Caitlin Hawke. When he witnessed her fight the abomination Wilmod had become, he was struck immediately by her grace and strength. Afterwards she confronted him about his behaviour, her emerald green eyes flashing with righteous indignation. He defended himself, argued as best he could, but all he could think about was how she was everything he had always dreamed about in a woman. Her red hair, her strong lithe body, her beautiful expressive face... It was like being struck by lightning.

Then she introduced herself and her companions and he realized with a sinking heart that her sister was a mage, an apostate. No way could he afford to be involved with her. So he stayed away from her, kept his distance, all the while dreaming of what could never be.

* * *

At first it was harmless enough. His duties involved long boring hours on guard in the Gallows, and more often than not, he found himself daydreaming about those large green eyes, those full lips, imagined her smiling at him, kissing him softly, laughing at his jokes.

Cullen was no innocent, but he took his vows seriously and stayed away from establishments like the Blooming Rose. Even if he had felt the urge to seek his pleasure there, his position as Knight-Captain meant his face was too well-known around town. The gossips of Kirkwall would have a field day if a high-ranking Templar openly indulged in brothel visits. Anyway, it was all just a question of willpower - or so he thought. An image of Hawke in a pretty sundress played across his mind and he sighed dreamily.

"Knight-Captain Cullen?" He jumped and blushed fiercely when he became aware that the object of his fantasies was standing right in front of him. Hawke was smiling at his startled reaction, but it was a kind smile and she seemed oblivious to his embarrassment. "I was wondering what you intend to do about Keran." He forced himself to concentrate on the matter at hand, secretly relieved when she recommended letting the young recruit stay in the Order. He liked Keran and would have hated to see him go.

Her friends kept in the background, but the pirate woman threw him a sultry glance and a knowing smile. Really, the people she surrounded herself with... The dwarf was sociable enough, but the broody elf that followed her like a shadow seemed savage, like a wild dog. He was scowling at Cullen now, his face full of suspicion and wariness.

When Hawke had made sure things were going well for Keran, she took her leave with another radiant smile at him. He watched her walk away, her full hips swinging, her long legs taking easy strides across the Gallows courtyard. With another sigh, he turned away. Some things just weren't meant to be.

* * *

A few months later, he was following a lead to a gang of lyrium smugglers down by the docks when he saw her. She was standing at a market stall, examining weapons and armour, bartering with the merchant and obviously enjoying herself. And right next to her, one hand splayed possessively on her hips, was a tall blond man in mage robes.

Cullen recognized him straight away. Anders had been quite notorious during his time in the Circle Tower of Ferelden. No Templar who had served there was likely to forget his provocative behaviour or his frequent attempts at escape. There had been rumours for some time now that the apostate had come to Kirkwall, but to see him strut around brazenly like this... It was impossible to just arrest him; his status as a Grey Warden protected the mage even now. Besides, Cullen had heard rumours of a secret clinic in Darktown, catering to the needs of the large numbers of Fereldan refugees, and he was only too ready to turn a blind eye if it helped alleviate the suffering of his fellow countrymen. Still, it was galling to let a dangerous apostate go free.

Anders had both arms around Hawke now, pulling her close and whispering something in her ear that made her blush and smile. Cullen watched as the mage's lips trailed down her neck, while his fingers softly brushed along the front of her dress. She shuddered and closed her eyes, her arousal clearly apparent for a few seconds. The expression on her face in that brief moment proved to be Cullen's undoing.

He couldn't get it out of his head, couldn't stop himself from wishing it was he and not the mage that made her shiver. When he was lying in bed that night, no amount of self-control could keep away the images flashing across his brain.

The dream started almost like the scene he had witnessed, with her standing there, trembling with desire as the mage's hands travelled across her body, but in his fantasies she was naked, her full luscious body on display for him, writhing in sensual delight. Then the mage was gone and he was the one touching her, stroking her, exploring her soft skin and she was moaning for him, just for him.

Cullen felt his groin grow hot and realized that he was almost unbearably hard. Unable to stop himself, he took hold of his member and began stroking himself, slowly at first, while his overheated imagination produced yet more pictures of her in his arms. Her nipples hardening like pebbles as his lips and tongue played with them, her stifled moan when he sucked harder and harder, the feel of her red silky curls when he spread her legs and buried his fingers deep inside her wet heat.

The dream changed again and he groaned out loud when he imagined her kneeling between his legs, her tongue playing around the tip of his manhood, swirling, teasing until he grabbed her hair and pulled her closer, and she took him in so deep he almost lost it there and then. Cullen's hands were frantic now, pumping his cock, as he saw her in his mind, her soft coral lips around his shaft, sucking him, licking him, milking him until he saw stars.

He gripped himself harder, knowing he was close to the edge, and his body went rigid with lust, muscles rippling on his stomach as he pictured her sinking down on him, taking him in deeply, riding him hard. His breath was coming in ragged gasps and his thoughts became incoherent. Her body, her heat, her wetness around him... With a final loud groan, he came hard, spilling his seed all over his stomach, violent spasms rocking his whole body.

It took him a long while to compose himself afterwards, and by the time he had cleaned up and gone back to bed, he was ready to admit he had been fooling himself. This wouldn't be the last time he dreamed of her, the last time his control would shatter as he imagined her in his arms. She was further out of his reach than ever, but even now the fantasies were returning, more graphic and vivid than before.

He heaved a deep sigh. That woman would be the death of him.

* * *

_A huge thank you to my amazing beta, zevgirl. You're the best!_


End file.
